September 2009- Autumn's dawn

What a month this has been....
I am ready to move on and leave this month behind me.
I have rather been anticipating unlike most friends my age, the anniversary of my fourth decade on this earth.

This past Sunday Sept 26th, I turned the wonderful age of 40. I think forty is a good point in life. My children are all but grown. I have finally finished up my night school after eight years tiring and long nights. My health is good. Let's not count the common cold which always hits this time of year not the few extra pounds I tend to gain over the winter months each year.

I was not prepared for the events leading up to that day however... I have had better days.

The month began when my transmission in my only car began to act up. The car, which is a 2001 model looks great, and is still on loan. However it has just turned over 166,000 miles and well, we take a lot of road trips. After having it looked at by a friend of a friend who made some adjustments in order to buy me some time. The car ran well again.

Until the 9th of this month a day I will never forget. That was the day my car began to really act up, that was the day which caused me to spend weeks getting my affairs back in order, and that was the day I lost my sense of security.
Following the burglary,many days were spent cleaning up the mess, getting my money back, and getting back to a point I could attempt to come up with a game plan to fix not only the car but some other much needed house repairs.
The car was making the same noises but still driving well. At the advice of friends, driving on borrowed time. My son being in Iraq in its own way is a lucky break in such that we had on extra car available. I let my daughter drive the 'limping' car to work and I drove my sons. Until I received a call that it had stalled on her.

We are now, sharing a car and I wake an hour or two early in order to get her to work and for now, she gets a ride home. Closer to my birthday I figured nothing else could go wrong and began to get excited again. My best friend and I were planning a great party with many people I have not seen in a long time.
Two days before the party - the actual date of my birthday- I came down with a horrible head cold. Everyone it seemed at work was sick, my daughter was sick... I really needed this party, I really needed this time with friends in order to keep my spirits up.
I managed to sway the cold away just hours before the party. Things were looking up again. Many guests RSVP'd that they would not be able to make the party for varying reasons. Sickness, other plans, out of town, among other reasons. But with a list 77 people long, I couldnt wait.

My best friend (the host) and I arrived right on time. We had a great celebration although... as MY luck would have it, only a handful, 7 people were in attendance.
Of course I dont need a big crowd to have a great time, and I know that the lack of attendance had no bearing on how close the friendships of those guests are. But the way that my month had been so far, made it a bit of a bummer.
But I love my friends, and I love my life, and although over the past 14 or so years, life has been much harder than it has been easy. I would not trade my life.
I am just hoping.... that the broken down car in my yard gets fixed soon without putting me in the poor house. that the rotting roof of my house gets replaced before it begins to leak and turns into a bigger problem. I hope that this month. This September 2009. This autumn of the median of my life, begins to change, that the colors turn that things begin to come my way.
Just this once.
(As I sit here to type this, I am home sick from work- it is back)